Men As Learners and Elders (M.A.L.Es)
a  program offered by the Center for Action and Contemplation

The following topics and themes, have been used successfully by other Small Men's Groups, for Segment II, the Mid-Ground 30 minute part of the meeting:

1. Introduce your father

Preparation: At the prior meeting, tell all the men to bring in a photo of their father and be prepared to tell about him.

Begin: Everyone gets centered with eyes closed, feet on the floor, and taking three slow, deep breaths in and out. Take whatever time you need to get centered as a group.

Instructions, Round 1: Leader tells the men that each man can share as much or as little about his father* as he cares to. We are not here to damn nor canonize our fathers but to learn more about how the man my father was influences my life today. Each man will have five minutes to introduce his father to the other men. (Adjust time limits to fit your meeting schedule). Remind the men that we are here to listen and receive, not fix, manage or control. No cross talk or questions.

Leader says: Any man may start.

Round 2: When every man who cares to has spoken, you can have a second round. Leader says, “I am inviting each of you to reflect on and respond to these three questions: 1. What of your father’s shadow do you see in yourself? 2. What of your father’s gold do you see in yourself? And 3. What do you want to do about all that?

Give a minute to reflect. Then, leader says, “Any man can start.”

When each man has spoken, give a few minutes for open discussion of what lessons men learned from this exercise.

*Some men will have been raised by a step-father or grandfather, etc. Or their father may have been totally absent. Men may talk about whatever strong father figure they have in their memory, or about the absence of their father. There is no strict guideline, but rather the man should go where the energy is and see what’s waiting for him there. It should be his choice who to speak about.

2. Recall your teenage years

Think back to when you were a young teenager. Who was a spiritual mentor to you then? How did that person go about it? What methods did he/she use to influence you spiritually? What did that person see in you back then that you wish were more present in your life today?

3."From Wild Man to Wise Man: Reflections on Male Spirituality"
by Richard Rohr, OFM and Joseph Martos (book)

Preparation - Before each meeting, read one chapter from "From Wild Man to Wise Man - Reflections on Male Spirituality" by Richard Rohr and Joseph Martos.  Start with Chapter One, and go through the entire book discussing one chapter per meeting.  The chapters are short, making them ideal for your small group to discuss in one meeting.

Discussion - Allow time for each man to share there insights.

Note: Father Richard Rohr, has revised and updated The Wild Man's Journey book.  Some chapters have been deleted and some new chapters have been added.  

4."Portrait of a Radical"

Preparation - View the videotape Portrait of a Radical with Richard Rohr, Huston Smith and Allen Dwight Callahan

Discussion - Why was Jesus a radical?  Jesus asks us to follow him.  How are we following him and where do we fall short.  Did something Rohr, Smith or Callahan said have particular insight into the teaching of Jesus.  Let each man talk about the video presentation and discuss anything related to the videotape.

5."Light of Christ Ritual"

a. Men are comfortably seated in a circle.

b. Each man receives a candle; facilitator lights his and then light one candle from another.

c. Facilitator: "Hold the candle approximately at arms length and focus on the light as the Light of Christ.  Approximate time 60 seconds.

d. Facilitator: "Have the Light of Christ reside in you; in your heart, your soul, your mind."  Approximate time 60 seconds.

e. Facilitator: "Blow out your candle, relax, and close your eyes; meditate on yourself as the bearer of the Light of Christ.  Approximate time 2 to 5 minutes.

f. Facilitator: "Open your eyes..."  Those who wish are asked to share their experiences from the ritual.

g. Questions for further discussion:

Who do you know as a strong witness to the Light of Christ?
How could you (we) better demonstrate Christ's light in our lives?
How does one become a source of Christ's light?

6. Website articles by Richard Rohr, OFM

There are several articles by Richard Rohr on this website on topics such a male spirituality, father hunger, the 12-step program, men and power, the two halves of life and other relevant topics.

Preparation: Pick one article and read it before the meeting.  Come to the meeting prepared to discus the article.

Discussion - Allow time for each man to share there insights.

7."Adam's Return" by Richard Rohr, OFM  (book)

Preparation - Before each meeting, read one chapter from "Adam's Return" by Richard Rohr.  Start with Chapter One, and go through the entire book discussing one chapter per meeting.  The chapters are short, making them ideal for your small group to discuss in one meeting.

Discussion - Allow time for each man to share there insights.

8."Soul Brothers" by Richard Rohr, OFM  (book)

Preparation - Before each meeting, read one chapter from "Soul Brothers" by Richard Rohr.  Start with Chapter One, and go through the entire book discussing one chapter per meeting.  The chapters are short, making them ideal for your small group to discuss in one meeting.

Discussion - Allow time for each man to share there insights.

9. Other resources by Richard Rohr

The following resources by Richard Rohr can be used for your small group meetings:

Beginner's Kit Life Changing Teachings by Richard Rohr

Men's Resource Materials by Richard Rohr

Beloved Sons Series by Richard Rohr  

10. "Inner Compass" by Margaret Silf

This book has discussion questions and it really set up for group use.  This is the book on Ignatian Spirituality.  

11. "A Retreat with Thomas Merton" by Anthony Padovano

This book is also set up for discussion group.

12. Use Richard Rohr's guide in your small men's group for discussing the movie Into The Wild.

Last modified: April 13, 2008